Everyone’s always running around saying things like: “Relationships are work” and “you have to make sacrifices in love.”
It’s true, buuuuuuut only to some extent. Surprise attack: Relationships CAN be easy, and you do NOT have to sacrifice everything!
Sacrifice comes with a side of resentment:
Nothing new here: Couple falls madly in love, spend every waking moment together, give up something (ANY-thing) for eachother. Then reality sets in, each hating who they’ve become, blaming none other than their S.O for it. We fall in love and unconciously encourage the other person to make sacrifices. Before we know it, they’re no longer that person we fell in love with. Sacrifice is not compromise. Watch out!
You wouldn’t stay friends with someone if it was a constant “uphill battle?”
Why do we make exceptions for romance? If I had a friend whom I constantly butted heads with, who demanded all of my time, and expected me to always drop everything for them, would we still be friends!? No way José. Don’t make exceptions; relationships are relationships.
Judge me all you want, I’m not one to make sacrifices. Relationship shouldn’t be really hard, and shouldn’t make you unhappy. If you’re feelin’ me on this one, here’s what you gotta do:
Sounds like something Captain Obvious would say right? Finding someone who likes the same things you do? Problem: We’re too often interested in people who are polar opposites. They’re interesting, they propel you to try new things, they probably even change you (hopefully for the better.) The thing is, it’s not ALWAYS for the better. If you find someone who shares similar interests, you won’t feel the need to change yourself… OR them.
If you don’t care about it, let it go
This is where the difference between bitchy Sacrifice and good ol’ Comprise comes into play. Don’t let go of the bigger picture of you, of anything that makes you the person you are. If you don’t mind giving up some of your slobbish habits ’cause your partner’s a clean freak, do it! No one will fall out of love over minor things.
Relationships are a bit lopsided. There shouldn’t, but if there’s going to be some sacrificing going on, it should be by both parties! Don’t let them immerse themselves completely in your group of friends and never hangout with theirs; give and take people!
It’s fairly easy not to get sucked in the mindset that all relationships are hard. Yes you’ve got to work at it non-stop, but a lot of it lies in the good selection process. How many exes do you regret? That’s what we thought!
Photo Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/298433912781454425/
About Britanny Burr
Britanny is from Canmore, Alberta, and attended University in Calgary where she received a Bachelor of Arts in English. She now lives in Montreal, and works as a freelance writer. She loves to do yoga, dance, write, read, and laugh!