Lose the Daggers; No One Wants a Lurker

Here’s the thing; throughout history there have been two breeds of humans:

1)  The notoriously single

2) The never alone.

This division has NOTHING to do with how attractive, funny, intelligent or flirty the individual is. So why do singles remain single you ask? It’s all in the eyes.

Single people are (obviously) aware they’re single, but this doesn’t mean everyone ELSE has to be made aware of it, or otherwise known as the ‘Trying too hard’ disease. The usual way it goes if you’re single and ready to meet someone is you’ll be desperate to go out, you’ll pull out your best moves to dance your way through someone’s heart and get in offense mode when it’ll come to making out on the D-floor. But none of it will happen, especially if you’re dead set on it happening.


If you’re walking around with dagger-eyes seeking a mate, this is the EXACT moment every potential bachelor/bachelorette start fading off into the crowd. Love, you are making this far to easy – and it’s a bit creepy.

The reason those in relationships are ALWAYS in relationships? They’re not looking for one! Stupid right? who came up with that?! Still, apparently, there is this rule in the universe that when you want it the least, THAT’S when it happens. Have you ever heard anyone say “I just want to be single” then BOOM, committed relationship? We’re gonna go ahead and say yes for you. ‘Cause we know! OH how we know!


If you’re one of those Captain Obvious mini-me’s, I KNOW you’ve heard this before but gurl, “make yourself less available”. Here are some tips to help you keep your cool:

Commit to a girls/boys night: Nothing looks more intimidating than a group of friends having an awesome time; make this you! Commit yourself to a night with the friends: laugh, dance, stop taking mental surveys for potential singles in the bar. Don’t close yourself off, but let them come to you!


Be a player (of game that is): If you’re at a party or around a table at a bar, start a game! Drinking games (or games in general) are another way to get flirty and competitive. If you’re partaking in a lively beer pong duel, you will attract attention AND will be totally distracted from the hunt.


Put Down Your Phone: Now, this is the hardest thing any person with a few drinks in them will ever have to do. Do yourself a favour and leave your phone at home or put it away and forget about it! Nothing looks more desperate than a drunk call or text (guilty!) especially if the other person doesn’t answer.

Dance: I mean actually dance. Dance for fun, grab your friends and hit the dance floor. You can’t see everyone else while you’re in the crowd, maybe you’ll even forget they’re there. Toss down some moves and have a good time. Mostly, forget about finding a mate, they’d probably just ruin your groove anyway!


Being single can be a blissful period in your life, and can actually do you some good, but only if you do it right. Forget that you’re single for one night and I guarantee that night you’ll be approached like you’re the last woman alive. Now I can’t, however, guarantee the quality of the approachers. #sorrynotsorry

Don’t let your relationship status determine your night! Have fun!


Cover Photo Credit: http://nerdylittlesecret.com/main/2013/08/oitnb-crazy-eyes/

About Britanny Burr

Britanny is from Canmore, Alberta, and attended University in Calgary where she received a Bachelor of Arts in English. She now lives in Montreal, and works as a freelance writer. She loves to do yoga, dance, write, read, and laugh!